by If your partner has endometriosis, it can be difficult to watch him struggle with the symptoms and their effects. You want to help, but you may not be sure what you can do or how you can make a difference. Here are some steps you may want to follow.
Understanding endometriosis
To start, it’s helpful to understand what endometriosis is. “Endometriosis occurs when the endometrial tissue, the tissue that lines the uterus, is found outside the uterus. It is usually found in the pelvis, but can also be found in the intestine, bladder and other organs,” said Ilana Addis, DOCTOR, OB-GYN at Banner – University Medicine.
During the menstrual cycle, this tissue thickens, breaks down, and bleeds, just like the lining of the uterus. But because it can’t leave the body, it becomes trapped and causes inflammation, pain and scar tissue.
Women with endometriosis may have:
- Chronic pelvic pain that ranges from mild to severe. The pain may be worse during menstruation or may be present all the time.
- Painful periods, which may include lower back pain and abdominal discomfort.
- Pain during or after sexual intercourse.
- Infertility, as endometriosis can cause scarring and adhesions, making it difficult for an egg to travel through the fallopian tubes or implant in the uterus.
- Other symptoms such as heavy menstrual bleeding, fatigue, bloating, diarrhea, constipation, and the need to urinate urgently or frequently.
- Other chronic diseases such as migraines, irritable bowel syndrome or fibromyalgia.
“Many people with endometriosis have pain either monthly with their period or all the time if the endometriosis is more advanced. A partner who understands the disease and symptoms can provide support when someone with endometriosis experiences severe pain,” Dr. Addis said.
Learn about endometriosis and provide support
You will be better able to support your partner by understanding the condition and its impact. Contact trusted healthcare providers for reliable sources of information, such as books, websites, articles, and magazines.
Treatment for endometriosis can vary depending on the severity of symptoms, your partner’s health, and your reproductive plans. You can learn about treatment options such as medications, surgery, and complementary therapies. When you understand the benefits, risks, and side effects, you can help your partner find the best course of action.
You can also learn about the challenges people with endometriosis face beyond the physical symptoms. That can include emotional distress, fertility problems and the impact of the condition on daily life. If you know what to expect, you can prepare and support your partner.
How endometriosis can affect life and relationships
The pain and symptoms of endometriosis can make it difficult for your partner to work, go to school, or participate in social activities. Pain during sex can lead to decreased sexual activity and strained communication. The emotional toll of coping with this condition can lead to stress, anxiety, and depression.
Encourage your partner to share their experiences and actively listen to their perspective. That will give you insight into their struggles, fears, and coping mechanisms. Validate your emotions and be attentive to your needs.
“People with endometriosis have often had a long and frustrating journey to diagnosis, so validation of their symptoms and disease from their partner is very important,” Dr. Addis said.
Try to communicate openly with your partner. Sharing feelings, promoting understanding, and generating support can strengthen your bond.
Try not to interrupt or rush to offer solutions. Acknowledge their feelings and reflect on what you’ve heard to help deepen your connection.
Face challenges together. “Endometriosis can cause painful intercourse, which requires an understanding partner to have a fulfilling sex life,” Dr. Addis said. “It can also cause infertility and the need for assisted reproductive techniques to get pregnant.”
What can you do to help?
You can support your partner emotionally. Recognize that your partner will probably have a series of ups and downs. Validate their feelings and support them without judging them. Watch for signs of distress or mood swings and create a supportive environment where your partner feels comfortable expressing their emotions openly.
Offer peace of mind and comfort. Let your partner know that you are there for them and that you are committed to facing challenges together.
Be patient and understanding and recognize that managing the condition may take time and adjustment. That way, you can strengthen your bond and build trust in your relationship.
You can also offer practical support. When symptoms worsen, simple daily tasks can be challenging. You may find it helpful to take on more housework, prepare meals, or take care of children. Offer to help without waiting for your partner to ask you.
Accompany your partner to medical appointments if possible. This shows that you are committed to their well-being and provide them with emotional support.
“It is often helpful for people with endometriosis to have their partner take notes on their doctor visits to make sure they don’t miss any details,” Dr. Addis said. Ask questions to make sure you and your partner understand everything you hear.
Prioritize self-care for both of you
Make sure your partner focuses on well-being. Remind them to take breaks and spend time doing activities they enjoy. Help them rest and relax and make it easier for them to exercise and eat well.
And don’t overlook your own self-care needs. Endometriosis can be difficult for both people in the relationship, so it’s important to take care of yourself. This will help you stay resilient, deal with the challenges you face, and support your partner.
Communicate with your partner to understand what you both need. You may want to be with your partner every step of the way, but you also need to take care of yourself. Find ways to support each other so that each of you gets the self-care she needs.
Help your partner find support and connect yourself with support
You and your partner are not alone in life. Your partner may want to share experiences with family and friends who understand and empathize. They may also want to join in-person or online support groups or communities where they can connect with others for advice, emotional support, and practical suggestions.
You’ll also want to draw on your own support network. You can reach out to friends, family, and partner support groups.
If you and your partner are having difficulty coping with the effects of endometriosis, seek support from a therapist or behavioral health counselor. A professional can help you understand your emotions, develop coping mechanisms, and find healthy ways to support each other. Getting help is a sign of strength.
The bottom line
Endometriosis is a painful condition that can worsen during menstrual periods and cause pain during sexual intercourse and infertility. It can provide emotional and practical support if your partner is dealing with this condition.
For more information on how to support a partner with endometriosis, contact a Banner Health expert.
